today makes me think of this over and over again...

4 years ago today at 3:22 pm...i met the most beautiful and exquisite little baby, Peyton Mae!!!

love at first sight.

took my breath away.

most magical and surreal moment in my entire life and i will never forget how it felt to hold HER in my arms for the first time or what it felt like to hear, "...it's a, it's a BABY GIRL!!!! ten fingers, ten toes, she is perfect!"

tears, tears,tears...so many happy tears.

i have felt so nostalgic the last week, trying to prepare for the moment she would be 4. not 2 or 3, but 4!!! must say i am a little sad, as i realize now that my baby is no longer a baby. she is a little girl with her own little personality, likes, dislikes, and charms all her own. i no longer see that little baby in her face, but a young girl growing up so fast and full of life.

the day of her birth, the day most special between any mother and child, i am reminded to savor every single little and big moment of her young life. knowing that we have so much more to celebrate still and feeling so lucky that i am her mommy. yes, i am still clinging to that little baby ,however, excited to see what else she has in store for us to enjoy. so much more to come!

ps. last night peyton woke up a few times, started crying, wanted me, wouldn't go back to sleep. annoyed, i asked her what was wrong...she said, "i don't want to be 4, i don't want to get big." she repeated this a couple more times to me and to her daddy with full on tears. where was this coming from? can she sense my sadness? did i say something? finally, i rubbed her forehead until i could see her eyes start to grow heavy like i used to do when she was first born. all the while thinking to myself...i don't want you to get big either. emotional start to an emotional day, but a good one.

we love you peyton. happy birthday sweetheart!!!

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo